Journey to Parenthood| A Families Adoption Story

                                             "Our Sweet Baby Boy"

   My husband and I have always had a strong desire to become parents.  As we set forth on our journey towards parenthood, we never could have imagined the path we were on would begin with such heartache.  While reading our story, you will find that fate was revealed in the most beautiful way. 

   After years of struggling with infertility, we decided that adoption was the best option for us.  We first contacted Diane, an adoption consultant/owner from A Step Ahead Adoption.  We learned all we needed to know about the process of adoption and Diane prepared us to become eligible candidates.  As a part of the preparation, we completed our home study through a Colorado Adoption agency, as recommended by Diane. 

   We were filled with excitement leading up to and throughout our home study  We had heard several different versions of experiences about the adoption process.  So far, our version would be, “this has not been difficult at all.”  Actually, we both found it refreshing to zero-in on ourselves as individuals and as a couple.  Jenn,our social worker, immediately put us at ease, helping us to fully embrace each step towards parenthood.  Towards the end of the home study, my husband and I went on a cruise and were away from our phones and email.  The night we returned home, I opened an email from Diane.  She asked us if we were interested in adopting twins that were due in a month and a half.  We were told that the twins were a boy/girl combo.  Also, the case was with the agency.  Needless to say, we did not get much sleep that night.  This was the first case we received and we were not expecting it to happen so quickly.  It didn't take us long to say, “yes, we are interested.”From that point on, it was “go time!”  We had not yet completed our profile for families to view and the birth mom wanted to view profiles in two days.  Of course, there was no time to have a professional profile created.  Ultimately, we got creative and put our heart and souls into creating a PowerPoint profile that we printed from the computer.  On the day of the deadline, I rushed our profile to the staff at the adoption agency.   I remember walking away thinking there was a slim chance we would be chosen, however, I was pleased that we gave it our best effort. 

   Three days later, we received a phone call from our social worker, Jenn.  I remember instantly hearing excitement in her voice.  My eyes immediately filled with tears of joy because I knew what was coming next.  She informed us that the birth mom had chosen us!  I found it difficult to speak through the tears, and Jenn understood.  She said, “go and tell your family and we will speak later.”   My husband was asleep, in preparation for working that night.  I paced the floors until he woke up.  Once he was up, I ran to the room and blurted out, “she chose us!”  Still groggy from sleep, he sat in silence and appeared stunned.  I giggled and wished I had captured his expression on video.  I repeated, “she chose us!”  We then called our families and began to share the news with all those around us.  Everyone shared in our joy.  Later that day, the agency called us with all of the details.  The birth mom was due in six weeks.  It was important to the birth mom to see that we were prepared to parent twins.  We quickly purchased two of everything necessary for the twins to come home with us.

   Next, we began decorating the baby room. There was no doubt as to the theme that we would choose.  Turtles have always held a special place in our hearts.  The peacefulness and calm that they exhibit is what drew both of us to them. It seems that we had accumulated more than a few turtle items during our travels.  Years later, my husband and I were married in Hawaii.  During our wedding ceremony on the beach,  a sea turtle even made it's way onto the shore. We took this as a wedding blessing.  The nursery would soon be filled with all things turtle.

   Prior to the birth of the twins, we met the birth mom.  We instantly fell in love with her and it was a good match.  My husband and I chose names for our future son and daughter.  Soon, personalized gifts came pouring in from loved ones.  It seemed the door bell rang daily with packages.  Everyone in our lives celebrated the long awaited joy.  Not soon enough, the time came for the twins to be born.  Jenn arranged for my husband and I to room next to the birth mom in the hospital.  It was a beautiful weekend.  We all bonded in the most wonderful way.  Several nurses at the hospital even commented on how natural and healthy this adoption was.  The discharge day was an emotional one.  Tears were shed by all.  There were so many different emotions going on for each of us.  We made prior arrangements for visitation and would all reunite very soon. 

   Bringing the twins home was even more magical that we could have imagined.  Our home now seemed complete.  Perhaps we even lost track that 96 hours had already elapsed.  We knew that this was the time allotment for birth parents to change their minds.  What we didn't know, was that the attorney's can use their discretion as to when they file the paperwork, up to one weeks' time.  In our case, since the birth mother had had a c-section, they had allowed her additional “recuperation time.” On a Friday morning, with Thursday marking our 96^th hour, we received a phone call from Linda, stating that the birth mom had changed her mind and wanted to parent.  It took several moments for this information to sink in, and once it did, we felt pure shock and devastation  After gut-wrenching tears and confusion, we dressed the twins in our favorite outfits, secured them in their car seats and made our way back to the agency.  During the entire agonizing car ride, we couldn't believe that this was actually happening. Through our tears, we kept a glimmer of hope that she may change her mind.  Once we saw the birth mom with two car seats, we realized we would have to say our final goodbyes.

   Immediately after, the agency staff sat with us and provided comfort and compassion.  We told them that there was no way we could put ourselves out there again.  They encouraged us to not allow this to shatter our dreams.  At that moment our dreams of parenthood were over and we were living one big nightmare.   Over the next several weeks, we cried, embraced, and talked about every emotion running through us.  We simply could not get those precious faces out of our minds.  Also, we could not understand how things could have taken such a drastic turn. The agency staff offered grief counseling and Jenn periodically called to check on us. We continued to briefly hold-out hope that the twins would return to us, even though Linda gently conveyed that this would not happen.  As time passed, we had healed enough to re-visit adoption once again.  After a meeting with Diane, we were once again hopeful that children would fill our home. 

   I am a true believer in that all things happen for a reason.  Throughout our healing, we felt certain that God had something beautiful in store for us.  My husband and I had countless conversations about 'keeping the faith' and told one another that one day the pain we had endured would all make sense.  This day would come when we were looking into the eyes of our child.  As fate would have it, a healthy baby boy was being born on December 8^th.  A few hour later, we received a phone call from Diane.  Her voice was full of excitement and she told us that our son had arrived four hours earlier.  She filled us in on some of the details.  The birth mom was from Hawaii.  My jaw dropped.  Hawaii?!  Also, the child was Asian.  My husband is Asian.  Diane informed us that the birth mom opened up the phone book to the adoption page and randomly chose her name.  After speaking with the birth mom, Diane immediately called Linda to coordinate the adoption.  Linda rushed to the hospital to meet our birth mom.  Within a few hours of receiving the phone call from Diane,  I was holding our beautiful baby boy.  Upon arriving in the nursery, I remember seeing the back of his head while a nurse held him.  I observed a whole head of black hair sticking out from a red knit hat.  He wore a Christmas outfit and I have never felt such love.  Also, I experienced an overwhelming sense of peace and gratitude

   While I sat in the hospital room and held our precious child, I thanked God.  I wondered about the birth mom and she immediately became a living angel in our lives.  We were uncertain of whether we would ever have the chance to meet her.  Fortunately, we got that chance.  I thought about how God allowed not only my husband and I to heal, but also everyone involved at the adoption agency. We all walked together on this journey.  We thank God daily, and when we look into the eyes of our son, we can't imagine our lives any differently.  We feel blessed beyond belief.  Thank you the agency and Diane for not allowing us to give up on our dreams of parenthood.  Thank you to our beautiful birth mom for your strength and selflessness.  You have blessed our lives in the most beautiful way and have brought joy to, not only us, but all those around us.  We will forever be grateful and it will always reflect in our pure love for our “sweet baby boy.”   

Mary and George